Absence Makes the Heart Grow Fonder.... or Does it?

For the last 11 days I have been with out my husband. He left last week on Monday for business. I thought in the beginning that things would be ok, I would be fine, it's only three weeks... right? Well, at first it was ok, Tim has been gone for a week before, but that has been the longest he's been gone for. Well, I got through the first week fine, for the most part, but now that we are closing in on week two, I have come to realize that this "being apart thing" is not as easy as I thought it would be.

For the first week and a half I stayed with my in-laws back in NJ. That was fine until we hit Saturday and I was just itching to get home to see Tim. But, Tim wasn't home... I returned here yesterday afternoon and things were not in running order.... I had no idea what to do, I was clueless and I felt all alone. I called Tim and called the phone company and everyone else I had to call... But I still felt hopeless. I even thought about running away back to NJ. But I am trying my best to get through... so far... so good.... I suppose.....

Any way, I guess on to the real post here....

I took the dog out this evening so that he could do his business. As I was walking him in our back yard I gazed up to look up at the sky and the only thing you could see was the twinkling stars in the sky. At that moment I realized how small we really are. I mean, we have all talked about this topic, we have all heard about it on TV, we have all dicussed this in some since course, and I am sure we have all thought about this at one point or another when we looked up into the sky. But for some reason tonight, it just stuck in my head... "Wow, I can't believe how beautiful the universe is, how delicate the details are the God placed on and around the Earth." And it was that moment, "Wow, how small I am." I seem to relate it this way, I suppose the only thing I could compare it to. We stare at ants crawling on the ground, how tiny and small they are, and I wonder to myself... "Is that how God sees us?"

Sometimes it's the little things like that that make the even smaller things look so grand. I'm not really sure where I am going with this, but I just felt the need to share it. You know, with continually reading Darren's Blog and keeping up with how things are going with him and the family, I just look at some things differently. I try hard not to complain about Tim being gone for three weeks on travel... I try hard not to complain about the small things that bother me, I try not to complain about money....but, I'll be honest... it's hard. But when I looked up at those stars tonight, and I all those thoughts come rushing through my head........ I felt comforted in knowing that God is looking down on my, no matter how small I felt in that moment, He was right there. Even though I was lonely, and missing my husband, God was there, no matter what was going wrong in my life right now, God was in control.

So, that's where I stand tonight. No matter what, God has control, even when things feel like they are falling apart. I wish this was more inquisitive like my other post, I wish I were more inquisitive like I was back then, but unfortunately this is what happens when you haven't been in school, or working, for the past 2 years....

Well, ok, that's all for now....