Friday, August 31, 2012

Everything going wrong at once...

I thought I have experienced this before. You know, when everything just happens to go worng at once, or everything is happening at once. But, with everything that is happening now, I can look back and I can honestly say, we have not experienced this until now.

First, We decided to move forward with one more try with a FET. We know that if this doesn't work, we will try again, we just don't know when that will be able to happen. We've exhusted all finances moving forward with this... But within the last month or so... Here's what has happened since making this choice....

The check engine light has gone on in my Highlander. Also, it's well over due for an oil change. It also happens to be time for T to take his car in for service. My cell phone has gone all sorts of whack on me. Turning off randomly, not turning back on. Not making a connection to a call for almost a minute after hitting the call button.... We decided to look into buying a chest freezer in order to buy more bulk when I have the coupns. (Well, this is now on the bottom of the list with everything else going on). Yesterday, I just a letter informing me that my dishewasher has been recalled due to a fire hazard, and we are still trying to figure out our opitions. And it just one thing after another... Something new everyday....

I trust God. I trust He knows what he is doing. But, that's not saying that it isn't difficult. It is. I've never felt so stressed. I'm trying not to let it all get to me, but it does. I am only human. I know that God will carry us through this time. I just hope all this will lead to a happy ending for us. I know God knows what he is doing in our life, and I'm Thankful he is carrying us through.

And, in the midst of all of this. There are exciting time, or scary time, or nerve recking times. I suppose it all depends on the moment, how we feel. Lately, to be honest, I've been starting to worry about this upcoming cycle. I'm just so scared that it's not going to work, and I'm not sure I can handle another miscarriage, or a failed cycle. I'm just at a point where I'm not sure I can move forward if that happens, or I would just have to keep moving right on, and that is just not possible. If this doesn't work, we are on hold until further notice.

But, let's try not to dwell on that aspct. Let's move forward, let's talk facts.

Sunday is 2 days away. That's the day 'llI begin Lurpon injectons at 20 units a day. So, what is Lupron:

Lupron = subcutaneous injection of a medication called Lupron (GnRH agonist). This medication is taken once daily. It prevents the woman from ovulating during the FET cycle - which would throw off the timing of uterine receptivity. 

I'll be taking this until September 14th. That day I go in for a baseline ultrasound to find out where the cycle will be, and that should be the offical start of the FET cycle. I'll know at that point  if the medication needs to change.

So, this is where we are. I can't believe it is starting already. All of August felt like it was moving so slow, and I couldn't wait for it to end so we could move forward. And now, it's here.

Friday, August 24, 2012

Once again, all cleaned out and ready to go.

Thank you everyone for all your thoughts and well wishes. The Surgery yesterday went well! Only about 30 minutes long, and thankfully, I did not get sick this time for the anesthesia. Also, this surgery was not as invasive as the surgery last year. Last year I did have this done, but I also had a Laproscopy done. This surgery did not include any incisions, thankfully.

The doctor did find a small adhesion, which, I'm not sure if I remember correctly since I was still pretty out of it when he talked to us, but I believe he said it stretched from the back of the uterus to the front right near the opening of the fallopian tube. He was able to remove all of it. And I do remember asking right before he left, just to make sure, if I was all cleaned out and ready to go. He said I was!

Right now, I'm feeling really hopful. I woke up this morning with the thought that this has to be it for us. This time, it's going work. I really hope this feeling is real.

Again, thank you all!

I begin, only one injection right now, on September 2nd.

A little more than one week away before we start again. I'm so ready for this.

Wednesday, August 22, 2012

Tomorrow is Surgery Day.

So, some changes have been made since my last update. So I know it's time for a new one.

Well, There was a bit of a mix-up about the orignal scheduled day for my surgery. So, we ended up having to change the day and the RE who will be doing it. Thankfully, I have met with 3 out of the 4 RE's in my office. And, I am certin at some point I will meet the one and only RE I haven't met yet pretty soon. So, Here's what's happeneing.

I had my Pre-op yesterday. Dr. K said that from the looks of the sono pictures, He doesn't expect it to be long. maybe 20-30 minutes. Also, he said that he doesn't expect to find much. He actually believes it's more likely to be left over tissue from the Chemical Pregnancy, more than a polyp or adhesion. Which, could be good news. But we will know tomorrow for sure what the stuff is inside my uterus.

After the Pre-op yesterday we had the FET, (Frozen Embryo Transfer- just to refresh your memory.) consult. Everything is set up and ready. I start the Lupron Sept. 2nd. And right now, The transfer will tentatively take place October 3rd, 4th, or 5th. But this could change. And could take place the following week, or even the week after that.

I recieved my medication in the mail, and I still have two more I need to pick up from my local pharmacy when they are ready.
Here's the stash for the FET, (Thanfully, it's not as much as the freash IVF cycle.):

See, it's not so bad this time around.

Well, that's pretty much all that's been happening since the last update. Only a week and a half to go before the injections start again and only about a month and 2 weeks away from transfer day. Hoping for good results this time around.

And, for a little infertility humor:

Have a good Wednesday!

Friday, August 10, 2012

Trying hard to keep up.

The only problem with waiting, is that I also run out of things to talk about and discuss here. And I begin to feel bad I can't keep up with updating.

Well, there are some small updates. We got our FET consult scheduled and that will be the same day as the pre-op, August 21st. And the estimated time of the actual trasnfer is scheduled for the first week of October.

I've gotten in contact with the office as well to discuss the RPL blood work that was done in October of last year. I have questions now that I am a lot more informed myself about infertility and my specific case.

Time for me is moving so slowly. I looked yesterday to see how much longer until my surgery and I couldn't believe I had just a little less than 3 weeks to go. It's all so far away still. And that makes me so sad. But, we just need to be patient, Our time will come.

Recently, I've been having good feelings about everything coming up. The surgery and the FET. And that makes me feel better. Tim and I are both also on the same page now about how many to transfer. We both have prayed hard about it and just know that God is helping us and bringing us both the same feelings on that subject. The best thing is, we both feel very comfortable about that decision.

Now, back to the surgery, if you're interested in knowing more about it and what is involved, you can go here to learn more. As we get closer, I'll start sharing more about the protocol for the FET, I'll share the outcome of the Surgery, and all that is involved with a FET. And, thanfully, it's not as involved and intense as a Fresh IVF cycle.

Thanks again!